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Bringing Mindfulness to Relationships

How does mindfulness impact relationships? Or does it?

Some people think of mindfulness practice as a solo-effort. But isolated introspection is only the beginning of the equation. After all, it is fairly easy to attain a sense of peace and centeredness in ideal settings of quiet, comfort, and natural beauty.

But how does this practice carry over when we find ourselves catapulted back into the messy world of dealing with actual people?

In today’s More than Mindfulness, Nesha shares a few ways that her practice of mindfulness and introspection has improved her relationships.

1. Boundaries

Healthy boundaries can help us create healthy relationships, and illuminate the ways we may be unconsciously using others to find our own sense of self. When we create self-directed boundaries and make space in enmeshed or confusing relationships, we find the clarity to self-regulate and self-define, rather than depending on others for validation and approval.

2. Ego Identity

When we pay attention to what triggers us in interpersonal interactions, we may become more aware of where we are clinging to an ego identity. When we can’t abide the idea of being perceived a certain way, it is likely that our sense of self has been wrapped up in a status, title, or achievement that does not serve our true identity and Highest Self.

3. Unhealed Traumas

Our reactions to other people can also illuminate our unhealed traumas. When we find ourselves in an emotional reaction that does not seem to add up, it is a good idea to consider the possibility that the person or situation has struck a buried trauma. We can offer self-compassion, love, and acceptance, and recognize that our over-the-top reaction is not shameful. Instead, it points us to the invisible wounds that need healing.

4. Trigger People

Trigger people are people that simply and inexplicably just bug us! When we find ourselves obsessing over every little thing that somebody does, analyzing their motives and behavior, and repeating our observations to others with a need to prove our point, we have likely encountered an uncomfortable mirror! Trigger people often exemplify the very behaviors or beliefs that we most reject or fear in ourselves. When we encounter a Trigger person, we can count it a blessing! He or she has come into our lives to bring awareness into something we were unwilling or unable to see before.

 

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